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Malena's Parson's Pleasure

My dear ladies and gents, Mrs Darcy is thrilled to announce a new name and a brand new Regency retelling of P&P ...

Please, welcome Malena and her promising Parson's Pleasure.

Isn't this a wonderfyl Christmas gift? Let's hope the first of many more!

Enjoy!

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PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE post again soon!!!!

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Collins is'nt dead yet, or is he? A hot Darcy in cold water Mamma Bennet in an uproar. Great start. post more soon.

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what a place to leave us with....please update soon...you can't possibly leave us hanging here until next year. I cant believe I'm saying this but I'm looking forward to meet Mr Collins.
btw did i read this right? Darcy is planning to marry Miss Bingley because she is suitable & have good connection? ummm what connection? The Bingleys were in trade...her connection is even more degradable than the Bennets.

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I don't like the sound of this Mr Darcy, though I wonder if they might mistakening Darcy for Collins,
what a clifhanger
Let us have a good highwayman in Collins place
and someone kill Caroline Bingley and I do hope it was Jane whom compromised Bingley, although I might be persuaded differently.
When did Darcy enjoy society?
This isn't one FWC is it? Mrs Darcy, please warn me whether E&D will be together.

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This isn't one FWC is it? Mrs Darcy, please warn me whether E&D will be together.

FWC? God forbid! I can't imagine they won't eventually.

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The Bingleys were in trade...her connection is even more degradable than the Bennets.
Hi Lou,
Thanks for commenting. Was he really? I tried to research but failed to find the part in the novel where Austen stated that.As far as I know, he is refered to as a rich man from the north. I would appreciate if you kindly refer it to me so that I can make the necessary changes. Thank you in advance and thank you again to be so attentive to the felicity of the plot.

Thanks everyone else for the warm welcome.

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Why change anything? Bingley's Darcy's best friend! A man so fastidious and conscious of his class considering B as his best friend seems to me in itself a legitimate reason to eventually marry his sister.

Bingleys'father might have made his fortune in trade, but Bingley himself belongs to the leisure class.

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Thanks Mrs Darcy...Still. Does anyone know where are Mr Bingley's oringings in trade stated in PP? I would really love to know.

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I'm pretty sure that it's said somewhere that Bingley's father was in trade. Haven't read the book in ages, though. And I'm pretty sure too that Bingley can handsomely live on the 5,000 a year his father left him.

And there's definitely no need to change the plot. In the book Caroline is clearly after Darcy. She wouldn't, I suppose, if she didn't stand a chance based on social class. Remember Darcy's a gentleman but doesn't belong to the nobility.

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Here you go Malena!

Chapter 4 (post Meryton)

They were rather handsome, had been educated in one of the first private seminaries in town, had a fortune of twenty thousand pounds, were in the habit of spending more than they ought, and of associating with people of rank; and were therefore in every respect entitled to think well of themselves, and meanly of others. They were of a respectable family in the north of England; a circumstance more deeply impressed on their memories than that their brother's fortune and their own had been acquired by trade.

Mr. Bingley inherited property to the amount of nearly an hundred thousand pounds from his father, who had intended to purchase an estate, but did not live to do it. -- Mr. Bingley intended it likewise, and sometimes made choice of his county; but as he was now provided with a good house and the liberty of a manor, it was doubtful to many of those who best knew the easiness of his temper, whether he might not spend the remainder of his days at Netherfield, and leave the next generation to purchase.

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Thanks again my lovely friend.
It has been a recurrent issue, but I have been so agreeably engaged with fanfiction that I have never had the opportunity to find it in the book and whenever I re read it, it has always been those parts where Darcy and Elizabeth share conversation. Momentarily my own book has been lent to a friend who has never read it. I know I have the online version...but I am all fingers with the internet.
I must thank Lou though, for the query.
So...Miss Bennet's presumed rank is what might give her the right to hope for Darcy's hand.

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I am looking forward to reading more of this intriguing story. Excellent job.

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This is a terrific start Malena! The whole water scene had me LOL.

This quite a bit different Darcy, a bit of a rake and care free. Is Mr. Darcy senior still alive? Not knowing what was growing in the fields, LOL.

I think I threw up a little in my mouth that he is considering Miss Bingley!

I look forward to more!

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Hi Malena
Interesting start, especially Collins and his fate. I'm curious about Darcy's boredom....had they not met the Bennets before the pond scene? And did Lizzy not come to care for Jane at Netherfield? Darcy seems too cynical to bother with a country miss, especially if he's practically engaged to (ugh) Caroline and frequently indulges in visiting Miss Swartz. Is this a high-angst story (for us wienies) and do you plan on an E&D ending? Inquiring minds want to know.

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Malena,

I see Renee beat me to the punch and posted the passages from Chapter 4 where we learn that Caroline Bingley is from tradespeople not high society (though she thinks she is royalty)!

When I started reading and read about Darcy thinking about marrying Caroline, I began to dislike him immensely and her even more! Add to that his rakishness and I definitely don't like him.

I can see that this has the possibility of being very high angst and I am definitely an angst weenie! I'm anxious to see where this is going.

What a completely different story line. Of course, now that Darcy and Lizzy are face-to-face (and a whole lot more) I'm anxious to see what is going to happen and just how badly Caroline is going to rear her wicked head!

Post more soon, please! You got my interest!!

Sandy

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Wow! I love it! I am especially fond of your keeping with the language of the times. I am very impressed and can't wait to hear what Lizzy has to say now that she has come up for air!

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Wow! This is quite a beginning and the only thing that makes up for this rake of a Darcy is the thought that Lizzy must be a spitfire on her own!

Lorena

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"Truth be said, Darcy was adverse to all sort of physical activities with the exception of shooting or fishing."

This description concerns me--sounds so unlike Darcy to be adverse to physical activities. His healthy vigor is usually one of his best characteristics. Here we have a Darcy who likes to carouse with his cousin Fitzwilliam and who is checking out a mistress--Hmmm.

However, despite my reservations, I would not take the time to write if I was not intrigued by your story. It's funny and an interesting set-up--and you have left them naked in the water. You know we will have to come back to see what happens next. Who could resist that?

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Malena,
I do like this version of Darcy! Will he compromise her and have to marry sooner than later? Hmmmm? I do hope so! I am thinking that Lizzy will be to tempting in a wet chemise, very see through! And he naked, in all his glory! Great story!

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Ladies...
One at a time.
First of all I am overwhelmed by your welcome.Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I apologise for typos...Many of them are Austen's typos, for I took great care to register her words, and many times I quoted from her and other classic authors. I have acknowledged that with **

I will do my best to answer all your questions.
On the one hand I am trying to make a happy sort of story. There will be the angst expected in PP. Basically is a classic Darcy - Lizzy.

This Darcy has been inspired in Mr Lefoy's characterisation in the film about Austen's life that has been recently seen in the theatre. You must remember the scene in which he rushes to the creek and dives in with no clothes on, and Jane spies on him.

No...Old Mr Darcy is dead. And Master Darcy is about 25 and not a rake in the least. It is the first time he is going carousing with CF, in the notion that he is to be soon married to some boring cow. I think I let that slid in the care he takes as regards the lady CF offers to him.

Darcy does not know a thing about crops. That was rich...was it not? Indeed, he is younger, his father has not been dead long.

I am having a lot of fun immitating RE. My poor beta is suffering a great deal, cause at first she thought I was writing complete rubbish. Now she is getting the hang of it, bless her soul. She said she had to change her axe for a pair of sissors.

As regards Darcy's iddleness...I was inspired in Mr Darcy featured in 'Lost in Austen'. There Bingley says that his friend despises all sorts of sports. Jane Austen also hints in Bingley's words, that Darcy usually is bored at home when he has nothing to do. Seriously...what has he to do? I love this scene in which the heroine has quite a tantrunt after debating with Mr Darcy over the benefits of iddleness. She thinks to herself...Lizzy...you are welcome to him!

It is not a indefinitely long story and it is almost complete. I asure you that Mr Darcy will eventually be an endering sort of fellow. For the time being he is what he is: A proud pig.

Relax and enjoy.

I am having a great time!!!!

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Frances,
I fear I overlooked your question.
If you read the preface again, you will notice that Jane arrives in Netherfield and immediately after that Mr Darcy leaves for London. Therefore, while Lizzy is taking care of Jane, Darcy is not there.

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Ah, Malena, welcome. I'm guessing this will be quite an entertaining story.

From your promising beginning, it looks as if whatever angst you give us will be more than offset by some devilish fun!

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Malena
Your Darcy is very different then the one's we usually read about. His Dad wants him to try to get on with Anne and think of her as a possible WIFE! ARRgh The Horror and then he actually thinks of Caroline as a possible WIFE NOOOOOOOOOO Never!

So he is in the Buff and she is **** near and when she surfaces they are face to face will they be spotted? Will there be a forced Marriage?

I can't wait to see where you take us and I'm thinking this is a Seatbelts only story?
Geri

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Malena, this was an excellent story beginning! I think it is so funny that Elizabeth & Darcy's first meeting is happening with very few clothes about. I cannot wait to see who the fake Mr. Collins is.

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Love the premise of an indulgent Darcy. Hope Lizzy whips him into shape.

How often will you post?
Best!

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Thanks Ladies,

He is a different Darcy from those we are used to encountering within fanfiction, yet not so much from Austen's male leading characters. I am giving prodigious care to depicting an idle rich gentleman as they used to be or at least as the BBC wants us to believe they were.Take a look at Beau Brummel or Lord Byron or Edward Ferrars...

There are sooo many questions...Just wait and see. I can only tell you I am having a great time writing it.


Thanks again for taking the time to write a comment. Keep doing it. My Ego will appreciate it.

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hmm if Darcy is only 25 is that mean the rest of the cast are also younger? Lizzy 17, Georgiana 12, etc ?
btw how is Mr Collins? to be left naked on the street...dear dear whoever finds that man is going to be scarred for life.

Adding to Miss Bingley's discussion..its true that Charles Bingley now is a young man in leisure and in the process of becoming a gentleman, but that doesn't change the fact that Caroline was born as a tradesman's daughter. Something that the ton would never forget. But, as the author of course you are welcome to take poetic license, maybe you can have a grand Duchess as the Bingley's great grandmother to make Caroline's connection more palatable for the ton.
Darcy himself might not have title, but his uncle is an Earl, and the Darcys are old money not new money like the Bingleys.

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Revealing all of Darcy's soft parts if she were to open her eyes.... Hysterical!

What a great start-- looking forward to your next installment. Is this finished and regularly posting or is this a WIP? This is such a fresh twist. Great writing!!

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as the author of course you are welcome to take poetic license
You couldn't have put it better.

But you put me to think and ponder my words.
Only because I just love to have a nice argumentation,I'd like to share my pondering with you all.

That Miss Bingley IS well connected is easily surmised by her relative intimacy with Mr Darcy. She obviously has spent at least one summer at Pemberley, which leads us to understand that she has been invited by Miss Darcy.Mr Darcy will not find necessary to invite his friends' family along every time he issues an invitation unless they are his friends too. Mrs Reynolds speaks of a large number of friends coming to Pemberley and we find that voila, again the lnof is composed of the Bingleys and the Hursts. On the other hand it is understood that Mr Darcy does dance with her("Your sisters are engaged, and there is not another woman in the room whom it would not be a punishment to me to stand up with)

Darcy speaks to her in very intimate terms, even tells her he admires Miss Bennet...wow!And she teases him with great freedom as regards his future connexions with the Bennets though later she says Darcy is a man not to laugh at, but then again, she says that to Lizzy, while blind with jealousy.
Lizzy knows she is jealous, and she thinks Miss Bingley would have married Darcy if it was not for Miss de Bourgh's first claim. She says so to Mr Wickham.

I find all these signs that Miss Bingley had every reason to believe she had a chance with him.

Thanks again for commenting. Keep doing it!!!

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hmm i'm not sure if Georgiana invited Miss Bingley to come as her intimate friend...i think its more like Darcy invited Bingley and well the Bingleys dont have a country house, and anyone know how bad London is during the summer, so Darcy says...oh your family can come too. I doubt someone like Darcy have a lot of close friends, so whats another 2-3 extra guests to suffer, if he can get his best friend in Pemberley.
Not for once I can imagine Caroline as an intimate friend of Georgiana, IMHO Caroline was just exaggerating her connection to the Darcys.

anyway, back to your story... how soon are you going to update? i cant wait to see Darcy's bits

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i cant wait to see Darcy's bits

Must say you are right. Georgiana and Miss Bingley are not intimate friends. More the Mistress of Pemberley's(Georgiana)duty is to be polite with her brother's acquaitances and under his guidance must have issued an invitation. This could have been done
1 because if a gentleman issues the invitation it can be misunderstood, therefore they usually counted with a sister, mother or sb like that to preside over the table.
2 because Georgiana is too young or shy to do it on her own so surely her brother instructs her on who to invite as it is clear when at the inn he calls her, instructs her, and then she issues the invitation to Miss Bennet.
3 there must be a third reason but my husband is pestering me to go have a nap.

On another tone, the story is complete, finished, terminated, etc...so you can expect regular posts.

And you will have your peek at Mr Darcy's soft parts in due time

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Malena, what a great start!! You've got me hooked!!

Your Darcy, Fitzwilliam and Bingley combination seem very interesting. I'm very eager to learn more about Bingley being compromised, and to hear just what Lizzy's reaction to Darcy's "presence" will be!!

More please and soon if possible?

Sue

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Chapter 2 is up, my dears. Enjoy!

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So has he or will he lose his memory? With the parson never arriving they would have no doubt to doubt that Darcy is Collins. Oh dear oh dear what a start.

More please
Geri

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Mistaken identities and a comedy of errors. Who will come to their aide? Malena, more please soon. Thank you.

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I can't wait to see the whole family mistaking Darcy as Collins
I hope he end up as a guest to Longbourn as oppose to Netherfield
Keep writing please Malena, a christmas present would be very nice :D

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I promise you dear ladies, if Malena agrees that is, that I will post chapter 3 this week.

It promises to be such a great story... Lots of fun and angst combined... Love that!

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Love it! Love it! Love it!
Very funny in places! Will Mr Darcy be confused with Mr Collins? Will the Highwayman turn up as Mr Collins?
Will Darcy remember who he is himself?
Oh dear!! Comedy of errors indeed!
Love to have the next chapter before Christmas.

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This is great! Keep it coming...

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Granted. Do post chapter 3 this week, Mrs Darcy.
Very happy you are so enjoying the story, by the way. Thanks for the words of encouragement. It makes me very happy indeed.

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Hilarious! That fight was fantastic!!

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This has to be one of the best stories I have read in the recent past. Keep up the great work and post more very soon. I love it.

Mo

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Malena, you finished writing already, horay!
I can't wait to read more, please Mrs Darcy - this makes an excellent Christmas present.
So Darcy isn't so bad, he sure sound liked it in the first chapter.
Mr Collins in dead right? after all, water isn't good for you in those days, you could easily catch pneumonia ain't it?
I can't wait for more :D

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...yet immediately rose, bearing an even more stunned look upon her face, for reasons the intelligent reader should not require explanation.

Brilliant! Well said, Malena!

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I should not have laughed at a gentleman's misfortune...but I did! Loved the fireworks display!

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Am glad you had a good laugh. Thanks for telling me. Thrilled to see you are following it Ellen.

Someone asked if MC was dead. I think it is clear that he is not. He was badly hurt though, wounded in the shoulder and he might catch a severe cold. We shall see if he survives or not.

And yes. The story is complete. I may add a scene or two to the chapters but the whole plot is a finished work already. Started working on it in August.

Again thank you for taking the time of commenting. Love you all!!!

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This is like The Taming Of The Shrew! Excellent story, will there be sparks soon? I can only imagine that Darcy will be nursed by Elizabeth and family, but will he have his memory? so many questions.

Lorena

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This is hysterical! I am looking forward to an entertaining ride. Thank you for giving us this gem!

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What a comedy of errors. This is a treat to read.

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Oh, my! I printed the chapter out to read while waited while doing some banking, and sat in the waiting area laughing and making strange faces! At least that is what I was told!I do have to say their argument was hilarious! "You witch!" Ha, what a great line! But, to be left with hardly a stitch of clothing on his person and injured, bad piture for Lizzy! Or should I say"Missy"?

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